


Comatose Confessions

by Talvenhenki



Category: Star Trek: Picard
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cris is not okay in this, Discussions of a suicide attempt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Tag to 1x07 "Nepenthe"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:47:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23044237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talvenhenki/pseuds/Talvenhenki
Summary: "Currently I'm more concerned over the fact that she's in a coma."Cristóbal realises - at the worst possible moment - just how important the little doctor is to him.
Relationships: Agnes Jurati/Cristóbal Rios
Comments: 26
Kudos: 48





	Comatose Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> This is a miserable one. I wanted to let out some steam after realising just how much Agnes had been through.
> 
> Warning for discussions of a suicide attempt! If it makes you uncomfortable or triggers you, this is not the best thing to read.

“Currently I’m more concerned over the fact that she’s in a coma.”

Cristóbal’s blood ran cold. He and Raffi shared a look and he leaped up in a speed he didn’t know he was capable of. The bottom of his stomach had completely dropped away by the time he slid down the stairs to La Sirena’s lower level. Running to the sickbay, he could only repeat Emil’s words in his mind like an echo of the moment when everything went to hell.

Cristóbal slid to a stop next to the biobed and fell onto his knees. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Agnes’ still form and the soft rise of her chest. He managed to take hold of Agnes’ hand even though his own were shaking terribly, and he brought it closer to himself, holding it against his cheek.

“Is she…will she be okay?” Cristóbal whispered. He was shaking and his mind was screaming to him that this was wrong, that he shouldn’t care.

And yet, he still did.

Cristóbal’s heart was hammering against his ribcage and his whole body was shaking. He could hear Emil talking but he couldn’t make out the words. The unconscious form on the biobed morphed into another – only a memory – and Cristóbal had to swallow the scream that tried to make its way out of his throat.

Suddenly the words _uranium hydride_ pierced his consciousness and he jumped up, gripping the hologram’s collar. “What was that? What did you _say_?” Cristóbal demanded, shaking Emil to stress his words.

“I _said_ that I found a hypospray that had contained uranium hydride”, Emil said, freeing himself from his captain’s grip as he spoke. “I fear this may have been a suicide attempt. Do you think she knew that we’re aware of her killing Bruce Maddox?”

 _Oh god no._ Cristóbal couldn’t handle the thought. He swayed dangerously and were it not for Emil’s quick reflexes and the chair he found, Cristóbal would have collapsed on the ground.

“She can’t”, Cristóbal muttered. She couldn’t.

Cristóbal hadn’t blamed her, not really. Of course, he’d been horrified at first to realise that she had been capable of murdering her lover but when he’d realised that the man had basically been grooming Agnes from a young age, he’d found he couldn’t blame her. Not when he’d seen her crying so openly in the security feed after Maddox’s death.

 _A suicide attempt…_ What on earth could have driven her to try taking her own life? Was it because she’d killed him? Or because of a trauma they didn’t know about? Or…

What if she was indeed the one being tracked, like he and Raffi had wondered?

“Tell me you can fix her”, Cristóbal said.

“I…”

“You have to fix her!”

Cristóbal was on his feet again, looking almost ready to tear Emil apart. The hologram backed away slowly, trying not to make the captain any angrier than he was. Mentioning the suicide attempt had clearly been a mistake.

“I will do what I can”, Emil said, “but you must know I cannot make any promises. Why do you even want me to fix her so badly? Wouldn’t it be easier to keep Bruce Maddox’s killer in coma?”

Cristóbal chuckled darkly. Why indeed. Why would he want Agnes to be awake so badly that he’d yell at his EMH? Well, yelling at Emil wasn’t anything new, but why was it Agnes that made him yell like that?

Because he was in love.

Yes, because Captain Cristóbal Rios had been _stupid_ enough to let his heart warm for another, again. Because apparently Cristóbal could only love those that would break his heart in the worst of ways. Because he only loved thieves and murderers and lonely doctors who’d been groomed by their creepy mentors since they had been 20.

Cristóbal was such an idiot.

“This cannot be happening”, Cristóbal whispered as he sat back down on the chair. He grabbed Agnes’ hand again and squeezed it, kissing her knuckles. He brushed her hair, stopping to stroke her cheek in an un-Cristóbal-like way.

“Please wake up, _mi querida_.”

After a moment of silence, Emil opened his mouth rather awkwardly. “Captain, may I suggest…”

“No, you may not”, Cristóbal interrupted, “instead you may call Nave and tell him to go help Raffi with whoever’s tailing us. Go! Go before I find a way to wipe that mouth off your face for good!”

Emil retreated from the sickbay, leaving Cristóbal alone with Agnes. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from Agnes, there just was no way he could bring himself to do it. He pressed her hand against his heart in a vain hope of it waking her up.

“You’re such a horrible person, did you know that, Agnes?” Cristóbal muttered, his voice shaking. “First you go and kill your ex and then you decide to steal my heart. And now that you have my heart, you almost took it with you into the grave. You’re the worst. The absolute worst. Why can’t I just stop loving you?”

Cristóbal drew in a shuddering breath and blinked his eyes. If there hadn’t been tears on his face before, there surely were after that. Weird. He hadn’t cried in years, not since his previous captain had died, and suddenly this tiny woman had made him a mess.

The EMH flickered into existence next to Cristóbal, asking for him to state the nature of his psychiatric emergency. Cristóbal couldn’t stop himself from laughing at the absurdity of the situation.

“I’m in love”, he whispered, “I love this stupid woman and she tried to kill herself.”

Emil sighed and hugged his captain.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments fuel my soul and inspiration!


End file.
